A lot has changed in a year. I remember this photo from last September. I am in a very different place this year, I’m two stone heavier for a start – so I feel like I look like another person. I gave away my clear spectacles, my hair is now bleached and damaged. I have no positivity about the new academic year. The things I liked about me seem a universe away.

I had a bit of a meltdown last week. It was a culmination of the work I’ve been doing and the too many cooks experience in my tasks. I eventually let go of the built-up frustration, but it took a long time to get there. And my lymph nodes feel sore again like they did the last time I was struggling with things.

My MRes is at a standstill; I’m not sure I’ll get the money together in time for February. And I’ll be moving in a few months. I’m tired. I don’t want to move again. My last seven articles have not been published. I started writing a poetry book on my reflections of school and it feels more triggering than cathartic.

I went blackberry picking today. I had (good) flashbacks from nine years ago about the summer I moved back in with my Dad and spent my time on a nature reserve. I had an idea in my head to save up money and buy a flat. I was convinced it would be as cosy and quaint as Brambly Hedge.

It was the first time my head had been quiet for days.

October cannot come fast enough for my liking.