February
9
February
5
Friday feels
Today is a funeral of a friend of my partners family. The sadness feels heavy.
At the same time, my father is getting the first COVID vaccine.
From next month, all the critically extremely vulnerable people in my bubble should have been vaccinated (or, at least, had the first vaccine).
I know there’s still a lot of uncertainty.
But it feels like I can take a breather.
Short. But needed.
February
1
One more left to go
I’m not good at presentations. But I want to get better.
This week I have two in work.
One I volunteered for, one I did not.
I prepared my presentation and wrote out my notes. I read my presentation to myself. I felt happy. I felt like I knew which words to say, and in what order. I didn’t see how it could go wrong.
But it did.
One minute in and I spat onto my chin.
Five minutes in my partner walked past in his boxer shorts (I told him I was presentating).
Six minutes in and my panic made my ears ring.
I wanted to stop. Restart. I wanted the words swilling around in my head to leave my mouth.
The urge to give up becomes overwhelming. I love writing, and I find it so easy for my ideas to flow on a page. It feels so incredibly sad that I can’t vocalise these words.
I splat.
But I’ll try again tomorrow.
January
25
Forming
Current mood:
source: gabbybernstein.com/superattractordeck
I’ve got a couple of weeks of meetings and presentations in work. Every two days I am dealing with something that increases my anxiety. But, you know, I’ll get there.
I’m also superexcited to see that Creative Education looks like it’s running again. I’m hoping I’ll get on it this year.
January
24
More like post-rad!
Current mood:
source: gabbybernstein.com/superattractordeck
Next year I’ll be doing a module called Looking Ahead, and it’s about continuous professional development. In typical Nina-style I’m looking ahead to Looking Ahead and thought I’d start vlogging about my next steps.
I wanted to stand for election for one of the Student Union volunteer posts but I couldn’t find any information on the roles (there used to be a Student Council Chair, International Students’ Officer, Mature Students’ Officer, Postgraduate Students’ Officer, Part Time Students’ Officer, Black and Minority Ethnic Students’ Officer, LGBTQ+ Officer, Disabled Students’ Officer, Environment Officer, Women’s Officer…). I was a bit disappointed but then I looked at the elections.
OMFG. Postgraduate Officer now appears to be a fulltime paid position! I emailed the student union because I couldn’t believe my eyes. One of the things I’ve been saying for years is that I’d like to see leadership more reflective of the student population. Obviously the student union has made great progress in many of these areas, but I am particularly excited to see the Postgraduate Officer!
Student Union Election screenshot