I chased up my last job interview because I hadn’t heard back. As suspected, I was unsuccessful but I’m going back to the college tomorrow to find out more about the teacher training programme. This is the second time in my life that a member of college staff has suggested I look into lecturing. As you know, my anxiety makes this difficult. But maybe there’s something in it?

Over the past month, my mind has felt like an adult’s mind. Which, OK I know, sounds weird. But I previously looked at challenges and thought Maybe later or When I’m a bit more confident. I felt like a youngster for a very long time, and always associated being an adult with contentment. I feel like I may be there, or heading that way.

Teaching is something I used to like the idea of, but I felt as though I wasn’t good enough and I am afraid of speaking in front of groups. When I thought about speaking in front of groups I’d panic. Now, I feel nervous at the idea but interested in trying it out.

Of course, this could be my medication talking.