So I had an idea and just sort of went with it, because I’m just at the beginning (kind of ) I haven’t started doing my own work yet so while I’m trying to figure out where I’m going I thought I’d start doing some life drawing classes… why not???
I didn’t really have a point of reference in terms of where I was going with them or if I’d even use them I just thought why not start doing something.
I’m gonna continue doing it throughout my project as I want to work on my drawing skills and also potentially incorporate them into illustrations/life playing around with techniques and finding what’s aesthetically.
I’ve put a wee few photos below to show my initial drawings, I’ve tried to play around with styles keeping some simple and others using shading to get a feel for the aesthetic I’m going for. I like life drawing because in a small amount of time you create a large body of work.
What I think halts my creativity is trying to look too far ahead trying a create ties and links between things that will link naturally. However by overthinking it stops me mentally which is what messes with time scales and organisation, by doing these life drawings it’s helping me stop stressing as much about what I’m going to create.
I’m getting quite stuck thinking about how I’m going to start doing work and stop completely focusing on research.
I love illustration and that’s what I want to focus on in my work however I’m not sure how to incorporate it or how to make my outcome more than just a few illustrations. It needs to have depth and variety which at this point I’m just not sure how to do that.
I’m hoping to do some photography but I haven’t decided how much of a serious photoshoot I’m going to do or if I just take some photos to use in some mix media illustrations.
I’m not so much thinking of my final outcome I’m more so thinking of my experimentation and linking it in with my research.
I’m still looking at Playboy, even though it’s at the start of my sketchbook it is a constant reference I’m using. With it being so heavily photography based that’s what’s making me consider doing a photoshoot but I’m not sure how good my skills are to produce something that wouldn’t look horrendous.
I’m gonna try just experimenting with some illustration work and see where it takes me!
So after getting rid of all those predetermined views and assumptions on Playboy I’ve had time to look through the editorials and view them in such a different way than at the beginning.
This has enabled me to have so many more ideas of where to go with the project and what direction to take it in. As I’m very passionate about feminism and the power of women I want to incorporate this into this project in some way and not lose sight of it.
I’ve just started looking at a book called ‘Girl on Girl’ and oooooooo it is brilliant, it’s exactly what i needed to start getting a basis of research of artists looking into the portrayal of women not necessarily in a sexualised way but just the way women creatives represent women.
From Girl on Girl I think I’m definitely steering more towards the Female Gaze and not the Male Gaze, which is quite exciting!
So I’ve got my start point, I just need to not get bogged down stressing about my finish point.
As I focused on Playboy for my dissertation I’ve found it quite difficult to look at Playboy without associating it with all the academic references and gender study issues in which I found in my previous study.
In my research I have started by trying to disassociate it with my dissertation and concentrate purely on the photography element, this has meant looking past the nature and theme of the magazine as well. By ignoring the surrounding influences it has allowed me to appreciate the artistic approach to the editorial’s, thus creating a new outlook that doesn’t focus on the objectification/sexualisation of the women portrayed.
It’s helped me to look more into the composition/lighting and photographs more as artwork less like soft pornography, helping to turn my previous outlook around into a more creative view.
This has enabled me to analyse Playboy in a different way, still with a feminist stance but by stripping (oh the irony) all the surrounding predetermined thoughts and conclusions I had made.
Well now that I’ve given Playboy some new fresh eyes it’s time to start looking into the photographers/similar photographers & artists to broaden my research and relate it more back to art.
Not only a new project but a last project, cry cry.
So following on from the last project (creative research) I was pretty disappointed with my final outcome as I felt it was lacking content and depth. I did like the final illustrations and felt they were a good representation of the basis of my influence and research. With this project however I want to go more in-depth and have more context surrounding my final outcome.
So this project, FMP. The last one, the last push to get the postgrad status.
I’m going to continue on with my dissertation topic looking into Playboy, however I want this to be my starting point and to build upon this looking at Playboy in a different context to my dissertation.
I’m starting my research by looking at not only Covers from Playboy over the years but also their editorials and the way they promote women.
As Playboy is predominantly targeting a male audience, the photography and way in which the women are presented is for the male gaze. Looking at the what areas are emphasised, body language, aesthetic, the general tone of the photograph and focusing on how this represents women and portrays a feminine stereotype.
I hope to develop my research further by looking into the female gaze and how women look at women, this is inspired mostly by Naomi Wolfe’s Beauty Myth focusing on the challenges women face with beauty and societies expectation of a woman’s physical aesthetic.
So this post was meant to be the finale shall we say, a lil cheeky round up of how I’m feeling with my work and general reflection upon this project.
BUT before we get to that, let me tell you about my crazy mad dash to the Tate Britain to see Rachel Whitereads exhibition there, I KNOW HOW CRAZY OF ME.
I researched her quite a bit for my project and I knew she had an exhibition but I just didn’t know when I’d be able to go, then BAM I went and I did not regret. I’m really happy I went even though my project is finished now anyway I thought it would still be useful if not for this then for Final Major Project!
So back to the ol’summary, I want babble on too much I promise.
Taking a step back from my project and looking at it as a whole (I’m only looking at brief 1), I don’t know what I think to be honest. I think from the outset I lost my way and that meant that throughout I was a bit confused and didn’t really have my head in it.
In terms of my experimentation and outcomes, I definitely feel I could have had a lot more experimentation I focused a lot on research then with not finding my direction till late on in the project I left myself little time for my own body of work. I wish I could of expanded more and been able to get a lot more digital stuff into this project.
Looking at my final magazine I’m not sure how I feel about it, it’s not what I imagined and I’m not sure you can really call it a magazine, more of a illustration lookbook? Editorial? I don’t know. I think I focused too much on doing illustrations and then too much on the basis research of the women’s march and just sort of forgot along the way about the fact it was a magazine and that could include photos, articles, I could have included my peers work etc etc.
However looking on the other side of it, I did think a bit outside the generic magazine box, going for illustrations which are very time consuming, then making it a visual magazine with my subject of Women’s Marches I think having an essentially ‘silent’ in a way magazine is a revolt in itself, a peaceful protest. Throughout the magazine I have shown a lot of different techniques, I not only included photography but also some digital manipulation (less than I would have wanted) and my drawing/paint skills combining these all together to get the final illustrations.
I combined a lot into a small project, I just think I might have tried to do too much in too short a time unfortunately.
Wow, well that ended up a bit more negative than I first anticipated.
And just like that it’s end of Brief 1, Brief 2 it’s been a pleasure and welcome Final Major Project!
Oh god oh god oh god.
I hate when deadlines get this close, even though I don’t necessarily feel THAT worried, it’s just you know it’s coming so no matter you’re gonna worry!
I’m feeling better about my magazine, I haven’t quite done the final layout and formatting but that is all to come! Especially because I’ve booked in a printing slot so I feel I have something pressing and definite to work towards.
My sketchbook I think I’m gonna do one more look over, make sure everythings good decide if I feel I need to add more but at this stage I don’t quite know what else I could add! But hopefully if that’s good I’ll get printed in the next couple of days!
Everything is looking up.
The only thing I haven’t really thought much about is my statement of intent, obviously I’ve done all the research and things and I’ve been writing my dissertation so I am very much still thinking about it. I just haven’t quite knuckled down and got anything on paper. I guess as well it’s not set in stone so if I’m unsure I do have room to change it, I just lose the time over Christmas to research.
Ahhhh it’ll all work itself out I’m sure, I refuse to stress about this when my magazine a few weeks ago was nothing more than a distant anxious thought yet here we are, at the final countdown!!!!
The deadline is coming and it’s coming quick, I’m feeling kind of alright about it which is surprising!
Brief 2 I’m feeling pretty happy with, sticking to what I know and using my dissertation as the foundation I’m really interested in Playboy anyway and I think I’m going to thoroughly enjoy being able to visualise this and go even deeper into the research.
For Brief 1, I am feeling alright I just feel I need more research but then I don’t want it to look like I’ve just crammed a load of random names in yanno. Everything I’ve looked at so far I’ve found to be relevant and has helped my project, even artists like Cornelia Parker who appears to have no relevance I found her work to be so useful in the way she makes things appear in a different way to what they necessarily are.
I’m feeling good with some of my experimentation as well, but I am still struggling with the magazine, I just don’t know what angle to take; should I go editorial, am I narrowing myself down too much doing illustrations, will the illustrations work in a magazine, do I do articles or just go visual, how to represent feminism and women’s marches, is this going to show my research.
These are all unanswered questions and I don’t have time for unanswered questions!
I think I’ve really struggled visualising this magazine and creating it, I’ve essentially finished the second brief yet I’m still struggling with the first which was meant to be finished two weeks ago!
I know that these questions are only going to be answered once I start putting my experimentation into action and actually start making final illustrations, I’m going to create ones I don’t like, I’m going to have to go through a process of eliminating the flaws and working through to produce something that does work and I’m proud of.
We will see anyway, the end is near something has to happen soon so we will find out!
I’m gonna change it up a bit and not just go into either a rant or just lengthy statement where I chat for probably too long so..
Brief 2 has come out and not as bad as first anticipated, especially now there’s no Social Media Campaign (thank you sweet jesus)!!
So like I said before gonna mix it up, so I’m going to write a lil quick bulleted pointed list of stuff that’s going well and stuff I need to work on to yanno motivate me, and to make myself feel better ha!
(Only for brief 1 though, haven’t even thought properly about brief 2 yet!)
Strengths of Brief 1:
- Started experimentation, digital as well as drawing/painting
- Been to a few exhibitions which has really helped look at things not directly linked to what I’m doing
- Found a lot of good artist inspo
- Nearly finished my sketchbook (yaaaaaaas)
- Research completely finished
- Making progress with final outcome
What I feel I need to work on going forward:
- Putting my magazine together/deciding if that’s the way I’m going then doing a plan
- Getting some final illustrations
- start research for Brief 2: choose to either continue with brief 1 or dissertation topic
- Getting things finalised, finished sketchbook & Experimentation
Yes I know not very detailed, but I know that it’s deffo gonna help me look back on the next week to help to more.
I also think it’s quite important to praise yourself every so often and not always put yourself down and worry/stress about whats going wrong.
Sometimes just look at what’s going right.
I’m feeling good with brief 1 at the minute, like I’m definitely behind time wise and where I should be. I think that being stuck in such a rut in the first couple of weeks really effected my time management and workload, especially with brief 2 looming over our heads now.
I dunno, I feel I’ve just got to grasps with this project and I’m feeling like I’m heading in the right direction and I’m gonna get lumped with something else to try and wrap my head around.
I know I know, technically speaking I should be finished Brief 1 with my outcomes if not nearly finished, which completely admit I’m not but I don’t think that it is entirely my fault, starting back at uni with brief 1 it just felt a bit chaotic and I don’t really know if anyone really knew exactly was happening the first couple of weeks. I know I’m not the only one who’s at this stage in their project this sort of late on so I’m not too stressed about that, I’m more just dreading this second brief alongside Business and our Dissertation I feel we have a lot of work in such a small space of time for such a low amount of credits/percentage.
I dunno, I’m probably just having an off day but I just don’t necessarily feel confident going forward especially with the inevitable brief 2 coming out next week.
We will see anyway, maybe I’m just worrying for the sake of it!
