Both my jobs ended last week, though I have been told one will be extended. Right now I don’t care. Or rather, I’ve got other things on my mind.

I am currently on compassionate leave, and I think it will be a while before I feel ready to talk about the loss I’ve experienced. The funeral is this Friday. I wanted to give a speech but I don’t know if I can stay calm for long enough to say my words.

I withdrew from university. I think this must be the fifth time I’ve withdrawn/interrupted. I’m planning to return next semester to do one module and, hopefully, leave with a PGDip. I’m also due to have a couple of job interviews this month – but again, I’m struggling to think that far ahead.

I’ve been spending a lot of time in the westcountry, and I’m struggling with the silence. I’ve always been a pedal-to-metal kinda person… right now I have nothing but free time and quiet. It’s stifling.

My latest piece in blogs.canterbury.ac.uk/staffdevelopment/

Connect with…Blogtober.

Library and Information Advisor, Nina has created a blogging challenge she would like to invite Canterbury Christ Church University students and staff to take part in. In this blog post, she talks about Blogtober (blogging in October) and how you can get involved.

I’m looking for students from a widening participation background to take part in a creative/reflective writing project in October and November.

More information at unibrightonac.sharepoint.com/sites/group-j

So, it looks like my library contract will be extended. This feels nice to know especially as I decided to hand in my notice on my other job (you know, the one that pays more and has more security?). I’m in a weird inbetween place at the moment. I don’t feel like doing much. I’m not even feeling enthusiastic about returning to Brighton – which is completely alien. I’m always enthusiastic about Brighton.

I was going to spend my winnings on a rocking chair (woo!) but instead I bought a cannister of oxygen for an ill relative. And honestly, that feels like it just sums up everything… plans change.