So far, I am very proud of my outcome of the development of my mental health issue with discusses micro dosing mushrooms and effects of anti-depressants. I really liked how the use of my sister in this article made it more personal to me, it was like I connected more with this article as I was writing something that truly meant a lot to me. However when I look at my draft of the mental health article, they are many things that I could change to it as I read over it.
Such as firstly, rewording the introduction, it sounds very forced to me and I want the article to seem way more relaxed and flow more within the content that I am going to speak about. However despite me disliking how forced the introduction was, I did enjoy that I used a question to end the paragraph, just because I believe it was more engaging and drew readers in. I also felt that the first stat that I used should be in bold as it is the most important thing to take away from this article, I want to highlight how important mental health is. I also believe that I could introduce my sister, Ella more to make her seem like a character that readers can relate to, I don’t want her to be a stranger.
The one thing that I am struggling the most with is making the micro dosing part of the article match the same personal tone as the anti-depressants, as I believe by matching the two tones together it could create something so personal and intriguing to read. To do this, I think by adding either more quotes or discussing with Ella on her thoughts of micro dosing, I could achieve this. And finally, I think by adding a meaningful last paragraph to round up the article would be very effective, such as maybe introducing a life lesson or something.
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