Birth is a natural, life-changing memorable event where women face a mix of feelings, varying from worries to moments full of happiness when they finally meet their baby. We all know how important and special this moment is for mothers, but what about the partners? What do they feel upon the moments of the arrival of their child? What are they meant to do? What are they meant to say to support their loved ones, experiencing one of the best moments of their life? What support is given to them (partners) in this new role of their lives?
We’re here to introduce you (if you haven’t heard of him) Mark Harris, and share a range of different links and resources with much relevant information about Partners during birth.
In one of our many research topics, we were directed to Birthing4blokes. This source of information and resources was created by Mark Harris, a male midwife, passionately helping and educating people (yes, not just partners, mothers as well, since he has a long career as a midwife). His books, online courses, podcasts and many other resources, all available online, are a powerful source of knowledge and experience for everyone going through this natural and physiological process. I’m using these 2 last words purposely, it is natural due to the fact that women, like many other animals, have been giving birth, since the beginning of humanity. Again, like what happens in the animal world, women will have a better birthing experiencing if/when the environment is suited to them, controlled and supported if wished so. This is something that not always happens as we know and hear it from different mother’s experiences, like the ones we got from our questionnaires at the beginning of this placement. The physiological process of birth, also sometimes called “normal birth” captures the notion that the women’s body will behave during birth in a physiological way according to one’s physiological parameters. However, we are all different, and our diverse backgrounds, cultures, religions, and rituals will deflate the use of this concept “normal birth”. No birth is going to be the same or happen in the same way, and women will have different needs and requests upon the birthing event.
Listening and reading Mark Harris’ resources, podcasts and videos was where I started to understand the importance and crucial support from partners to birthing mothers and even for their own state of calmness and new role. Mark mentions a variety of aspects regarding partner’s support and role, in which he explain how the different hormonal imbalance results in different behaviours, from men and women, and how the connections between partners is an important factor contributing to a better birthing experience. He also talks about partner’s fears and concerns, their roles and preparation for fatherhood, how can they help to keep the oxytocin flowing and how the environment plays a crucial role for a stress-free birthing experience.
As an Occupational therapist, I could not agree more with his views where a suitable and client-centred environment, enhancing labour, partners’ presence and individualised sensory input would maximise an optimum birth experience – check out other posts on our blog where we explain the power of environment for birth space from an occupational therapy lens J
For further reading and interest in this topics, here is a list of the different links relating to partner’s experiences during birth, their roles, support and how relevant this topic is currently, not only due to the Covid situation that is challenging partners to experience birth but as a turn to a more holistic/client-centred approach in midwifery, where partners are also seen as having a primary and much-needed role in the birth of their children.
https://birthing4blokes.com/ – Extensive and informative resources for partners to best support and experience childbirth and many other articles in preparation for fatherhood.
https://birthingawareness.com/ – – Mark Harris, the founder of BirthingAwareness and BirthingAwareness Publishing
https://www.birthyouinlove.com/birthing4blokes/ – Kati Edward’s blog, a KG hypnobirthing teacher trainer, UK recognised birth doula, positive birth campaigner. A resourceful blog, where you can find a video from Mark Harris regarding his birthing4blokes online course and testimonies.
https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/blog/birthing-for-blokes-interview-with-mark-harris-midwife/ – Fear free childbirth + motherhood, taking the fear out of pregnancy, birth and motherhood. Another resourceful blog, where you can find an interview podcast with midwife Mark Harris.
By Raquel Caninas de Freitas, August 2020
Time to reflect… considerations for the future.
What does this new role as a father/mother involve? Are there partners classes that prepare you for fatherhood? How can I help to make the birth environment more suitable for my partners’ wishes/choices?
How can health care professionals help partners to prepare themselves for this new role? How can we make them feel valued and important during birth?
