I got my first job rejection of the year. I am distraught. I actually thought I met all of the criteria on the job specification and I thought that came across well in my writing. Normally when I apply for a job I have a bit of self-doubt. I didn’t this time. Admittedly, I didn’t think I’d get the job as I’m notoriously rubbish in job interviews (my friends have catalogued my faux pas in the past) but I thought I’d get shortlisted.

I’m not the best writer – readers will know this already. So obviously, that’s what let me down. I don’t know how to get better. I know what’s required from my answers but that doesn’t make it easier. I find it hard to sing my own praises. I’m certain my lack of confidence came through in my writing – I say things like I feel as though my experience in this area… rather than I am! I need to say I am more often. I am good at things. But even just writing that feels uncomfortable. My natural response is to say I feel as though I am good at things. Ha. I am feels too bold.

I feel sad because I felt as though the job role was perfect for me. It was in a university gallery in the southeast. I would have been able to stay in UNISON HE, UNISON SE and I’d be working in a gallery (my dream). I would have moved out of Brighton which I’d feel sad about but that was the only downside. I don’t see many opportunities like this role come up – normally when university gallery/museum jobs come up they are for curators, researchers or managers – this role was entry-level.

This is a bit of a big month for me. This week I start doing my museum mentoring again and I return to university. I start my next module so on Wednesday I’ll be briefed about what will be happening next week in the Tate! The Tate. This is a huge step and I feel really nervous. But I’m just going to bite the bullet (or try) and get stuck in.

Later this month I return to counselling after a month’s break and I’m standing for election again.

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