Looking back at my films it is clear that there is a lack of diversity. All of the subjects are the same ages and the same race. In hindsight, it would have been better to street cast the film so that we can see people from a broader range outside of the university. I also think it would be interesting to do live group portraits instead of a singular person. It would be interesting to see if people found comfort in knowing they had someone they trusted by there side.
After having rewatched the first full-body awkward film I thought that there wasn’t enough human interaction. The piece felt a little hostile and although this was originally the idea I wanted to create another film that would show my interaction with the participants and let the audience see what they were really thinking. The piece feels warmer and a lot more relatable. Whereas before you are simply watching their mannerisms and how they act in the camera without knowing them at all now you get a glimpse of there personality before they are subject to the five minutes of silence. It is easier to project yourself on to this film and have empathy for the subjects within it. In the future I would like to do more filming when it seems as though the camera is not on and see how people change there attitude when they think the camera is now on them and rolling.
I wanted the article to be physically awkward to read. I have always watched my dad struggle to read the newspaper and always found it awkward when people read newspapers on the tube. They take up too much space and are difficult to maneuver in compact spaces, often blocking other passengers’ view. The clumsy nature of a newspaper would be the perfect fit for this article, however, I at the moment do not have enough words to fill a whole newspaper so I have instead mocked up what a double-page spread would look like.
Moving forward I could collaborate with other writers and illustrators to make a full newspaper that would work alongside an exhibition or film.
Looking back at my work it has become clear to me that everything I have done has been very ‘real’. When looking at the subject of awkward it was imperative that I did not lie or try to cut corners. The more authentic the work was or in fact, the more mistakes I made would make the work more real and therefore awkward. This is why looking back I do not think the medium of VR was a good idea as there was no space for mistakes. Computer software can be unforgiving and it does not make space for the beauty of human error. This is why the format of film is so perfect for this topic.
The majority of the work I have done has taken on a physical format where I can imagine people interacting with the work and hopefully developing real raw emotion. The exhibition spaces seem very honest much like the films that would be in them. The more honest and ‘real’ the work is the more likely I am to be able to play with people’s emotions and let them discover what awkward means to them.
I am happy with the article although I think that it could be longer and be more in-depth. At the moment it is a take on awkward and moving forward I would like to perhaps turn it into a series of articles that could become a newspaper.
It was important to me to bring humour into my work as awkward and humour have such a large cross over. When researching some of my favourite comedians and writers I found that a lot of them hide behind humour to deflect their awkwardness. An article seemed like the perfect way to tie all of my pieces of work together. Looking into my final project this could become a press piece for the exhibition or a hand out once you are there, Or it could take form in a completely different entity.
I enjoyed writing this piece at the end of the project it allowed me to collate all my findings and thoughts around the subject into one piece.
Being dyslexic writing is something that I find very hard to do, however, I enjoy it. To try and get back into writing it has been very important to read some of my favourite writers columns. Vice is very important to look into as I hope to write in a conversational style of writing that is both funny and informative. Talking to people about this subject has been very helpful in informing my work.
Vice articles and books-
For a magazine project last year I wrote satirical articles about being a millennial. For this project, I wanted to write a piece about my subject matter. To get back into writing I have looked back at my old pieces and looked further into satirical writes including Joel Gobly, AA Gill, Caity Wearer, Stewart Lee and Frank O’Hara.
Attached are articles that have inspired me –
Below is an exhibition space that Betak designed for Felipe Oliveria Baptista. It is called ‘into the brain of Felipe Bapista’. It maximizes hi and low tech technology assembled together that was inspired by the beginning of the movie Brazil. It is made of small LEDs and a camera bought from a market in Shanghai. Although the piece displays 10 years’ worth of work and editorial pieces in reminds me of surveillance. To me, the piece replicates a government workers brain that has exploded to reveal all the secrets of who they have been watching. This piece was a big influence when I first started to look into surveillance.
I think film as a medium is incredibly awkward and clumsy. You have no idea how it will end up and it could easily go wrong. I once did a project on art foundation on film only to get them developed a week before my deadline to find the film was blank as it had been loaded wrong. This process was anxiety-inducing and very awkward to admit to my tutour. The process of scratching into film, I think is also awkward as it feels wrong to deface something like that. Film is something that is not only expensive but a very praised medium, to scratch and put holes through it feels wrong. In an age where everything is photoshopped and ‘Instagram worthy’ film feels like the perfect medium to work with when discussing awkwardness. There is a fragility to it and an honesty that can not be truly discovered with digital prints. I hope to take this medium forward when working on my FMP